Repost VIII: What Happens in the Bris (Stages of Circumcision)

 The Bris (technically, the Milah = Circumcision) has a few stages that a Mohel must follow in order to produce a "Kosher Bris" and, hopefully a nice circumcision as well.

We have already "reposted" the methods of circumcision (2nd link shared on that page)

The day of the bris, the baby should stop eating a small time before the moment of circumcision, to avoid the possibility of his spitting up and choking will crying. 

People stand when the baby is brought in to the room

This basically describes the ceremony that everyone sees

This is what circumcision looks like (in words, no photos, except of a banana)

Repost VII: Timing and Delaying the Bris

Just about everyone knows that the Bris takes place on the 8th day of life. 

Not everyone knows that the first day of life counts as "Day 1," no matter what time of day it is, as long as it is before sunset. 

So, a baby born any time in the AM on Monday, until sunset on Monday, will have his bris the following Monday.  Born after sunset on Monday will have his bris the following Tuesday. (fill in any other day of the week for a similar equation... exception to follow)

Repost VI: Defining Terms of the Bris Ceremony

A little while back I wrote several mini articles defining some of the most common terms and phrases related to Bris.  This is different than the tools of the trade, which will be reposted soon.  

• Bris Milah

• Kibbudim

• Milah U'Priah

• Kisei Shel Eliyahu

• Bris (similar to Bris Milah)

• Milah and Mohel

• Baal Bris
• Metzitzah - This is a link to the Metzitzah page which covers this topic from top to bottom. The links which include videos are outdated as the videos have all been taken down from youtube (shock of shocks)

Repost V: Choosing Your Mohel

Mohels (religious ritual circumcisers) are trained in different ways, and may have different methods of circumcising and tending to the post-circ wound.

Training and experience lead to there being Different Kinds of Mohels

Here is a summary of the different ways most mohels might circumcise

Here are good questions to ask a Mohel (further research required to find the answers YOU WANT TO HEAR)   [And a summary of links made much earlier in the history of this blog]

Is cleanliness and sterility important to you?

It is important to pick a mohel who is confident in what he does, but also humble about what he does (don't look for someone who calls himself "the most authentic"), and honest about being human (while aiming for perfection!)

This was meant to be a guide for finding your son's Mohel

Repost IV: Preparing the Mind

In life, we often have dreams of what the "perfect" day will look like. The perfect wedding, the perfect vacation, the perfect Shabbos table, the perfect child, the perfect spouse. 

Reality tends to bite hard in most cases, as we discover that perfection is a lot harder to come by than we thought, hoped, and planned for.

And so it is with brisses. Whether the caterer forgets a detail, an important family member gets stuck in traffic, the mohel comes an hour late (something I work very hard to avoid doing, btw!), or even if the circumcision itself doesn't come out perfectly... we have to always hope and pray for the best, but prepare for imperfection to be the reality.

Repost III: Setting Up For the Bris

Just to make clear: This is not advice on how to set up the celebratory meal and/or buffet

The original post on this subject can be found here.

While the link above will suffice, just remember these few tips.

If there is a ceremony (as opposed to a very private affair), the bris should be in a prominent place in the room

There should be good lighting, so the mohel can see what he is doing!

Every mohel needs a table to lay out his supplies. It should be larger than a TV table. A card table or most folding tables are adequate.

There either need to be one or two chairs available - for the Chair of Elijah (Kisei Eliyahu). If the chairs available are barstool height, there should be some kind of stepstool available for the Sandak to put his legs so he can easily hold the baby. 

It is also very helpful for a private room to be designated or arranged (if in a venue outside of the home) for the mohel to examine the baby before hand and afterwards, particularly if he intends to check the bandage before leaving. 

Repost II: Planning the Bris Celebration Party (Budgeting tips as well)

You may or may not have been to a bris before. People have brisses in every kind of venue, from a synagogue to a JCC, a country club party room to a restaurant, a relative's (or friend's) house to the home of the baby.

Sometimes I joke that "I won't do a bris in a church" (even though I'm being serious, but it sounds funny).

There are a number of other celebrations that come with the birth of a boy - such as a Kiddush on Shabbos in Shul, a Shalom Zachar, or a Brit Yitzchak. Those are mentioned here

Now we will focus solely on the The Bris Itself 

The link above (two lines up) goes into detail, but here are a few things you'll want to consider.

How Elaborate? It's a matter of taste, size of guest list, and - of course - budget. 

Repost I: Planning in Advance

 Since this website is in blog form, unless people search for what they are looking for, some of the early blog posts don't get much attention - though that's where much of the important stuff is!

You can always go here for the most important info preparing you for the bris and the ceremony:

http://www.mohelinsouthflorida.com/2015/01/the-basic-information-all-you-need-to.html

Over the coming weeks, I'll be posting things that have been written before, in a little bit more of an organized fashion, so newcomers can find things closer to the top of the blog roll.

FIRST TOPIC: PLANNING IN ADVANCE (this first appeared here, in the first blog post ever!):

It is edited from there to reflect things I've seen and experienced since this was first written. 

PLANNING AHEAD  <-- That link is to a similar discussion of this nature

 Sometimes it is helpful - BEFORE baby comes - to think things out, to decide who will do what once baby arrives. 

Purchases - Baby Supplies

     * Car Seat 

If you're going to have a hospital birth, you'll need a car seat for that ride home (with a home birth, you won't need one until you're ready to take the baby somewhere!). 

What's The Rush? On Having Baby and Caring For Him

Disclaimer: I am only a mohel. I am not in the "birthing business." I leave that to the OBs and the Midwives. I am also not a doctor - though I do specialize in circumcision and care for the post-op circumcision spot.

Many years ago, I wrote this in response to a recall on Children's Tylenol, addressing (in layman's terms) whether Tylenol for a cranky post-bris baby was a good idea.

I've also given a few tidbits that I've picked up over the years, which I wrote about here. There's a link there to another article I wrote on this topic as well. It's mostly "parenting suggestions" for parents to get the most out of the experience of caring for the baby post-bris, and even longer term, such as how to avoid diaper rashes, misshaped heads, the question of feeding baby on a schedule... etc

To the medicating question, however, I'll add... WHAT'S the rush to medicate? Is the bandage too tight? Is there a bandage at all? Has the baby been fed? Is he able to urinate? Does he have a clean diaper? See that he is comfortable! Most babies ARE consolable after the bris. Most babies are FINE after the bris, when clean, fed, held, etc. 

EVERY medical intervention has potential, unanticipated side effects.  EVERY ONE. Tread with much caution. Read labels. Never make hasty decisions. Research. Don’t take one person’s word or advice without seeking information from other sources. 

Here I'd like to offer another anecdotal piece of advice, and that is to choose your health provider very carefully. 

A lengthy discourse on the significance of a Bris Milah Celebratory Meal

 I don't have the time to translate this right now... and some of it goes off on tangents that include the language of a Ketubah. But here is a comment on the meal held over the arrival of Yisro to the Israelite encampment, and specifically to Moshe's tent, where a meal was held in his honor. Some are of the view that the celebration was over Yisro's circumcision, thus making the meal a Celebratory Bris Meal! The author is Rabbi Yochanan Luria in his Meshivas Nefesh.

משיבת נפש שמות פרק יח פסוק יב 

(יב) ויבא אהרן וכל זקני ישראל לאכל לחם עם חתן משה וכו'. ראוי לדרוש לנישואין, גם מקצת לדרוש ברית מילה, וכן דרשתי. פירש"י ומשה היכן היה [כו'] אלא היה עומד ומשמש לפניהם, גם פי' על לפני האלקים מכאן שהנהנה מהסעודה שת"ח מסובים בה כאילו נהנה מזיו השכינה. לפי זה המקרא מסורס והיה ראוי פי' זה אם באו אחרים לאכול עם אהרן והזקינים. (מראה) [ונראה] לי שבכאן בא יתרו להתגייר שנאמר עתה ידעתי וכו', אמרו רז"ל במס' (תענית) וכריתות ובסמ"ג בסי' קי"ו שבג' דברים נכנסו אבותינו לברית, במילה וטבילה וקרבן וכו'. נ"ל גר הבא להתגייר צריך ג' דברים הללו, ולמדנו כולם מזאת הפרשה, מילה זאת היא סעודה של מצוה ע"כ אמר שבאו לאכל לחם לפני האלקים, ואמר ויבא אהרן וכל זקני ישראל ולא הזכיר משה, להודיענו שבא לטבול על פי הדיינים כמו משפט, וא"כ משה היה פסול לדיין. והרצאת דמים אמר בפירש ויקח יתרו עולה וזבחים.